ISTJ and INFP/ENFP Relationship Questions (XPOST r/infp) : ENFP
ENFPs take their relationships very seriously, but also approach them with a childlike enthusiasm and energy. They seek and demand authenticity and depth in. ENFPs are all-or-nothing people in their lives and in love. They take ENFP relationships are full of adventure and excitement. This is everything you . At the end of the day, security is everything for us. We need to know that. Hello everyone, I'm a male ISTJ that's married to an INFP/ENFP. I'm an ENFP male engaged to an ISTJ female in a yr relationship. She may not understand why your need for security and financial independence.
It will take us quite a bit of time and some gentle prodding to actually open up to you. This is probably one of the most surprising things about ENFPs. While we come off as being incredibly warm and open, we can actually be very private. We rarely share personal things about ourselves with others.
This is a juxtaposition of sorts, because what we crave most are meaningful conversations and interactions. The clincher is that while we want to know ALL about you, we will often hold back in sharing much about who we are and what we need from the people we do life with.
There is a lot going on in my heart and mind on an ongoing basis that I might never feel that I am able to process externally with someone I love, unless they ask the right questions. There are very very few people who know me deeply, and those who do have really taken the time to invest in me.
If you take any time to observe an ENFP, you will notice that they are usually focused on other people. Love us through the layers.
The ISTJ Male: The Most Popular Man in Romantic Novels | PairedLife
Ask open ended questions to encourage us to dive deeper with you. ENFPs are external processors. What this means for the people who share space with us is that we are often coming to revelations about things while we are speaking.
Some of the people I have felt the safest with in life have been those that I can sit beside and think out loud with. It is one of the ways we make sense of life and having someone willing and unassuming enough to help us by listening to us process is gold. Verbal praise is everything. We are over-analyzers and we know that we have big personalities.
Human connection is something ENFPs thrive off of and it is something we not only crave, but something we need to feel balanced. We need to know that you see us and appreciate us. ENFPs are people who need verbal praise often, especially from the people we care about. We need to know where we stand with you. This is a difficult one to write about without seeming really needy.
This is an area where we have the potential to feel the most loved, if your comments are sincere. I guess the best way to love us in this respect is to be cognizant of the fact that this really is a consistent need of ours.
Be specific in your praise and tell us when we do something that makes you grateful or proud. Go with the flow. An ENFP friend of mine recently got out of a long relationship where the deal breaker was the difference in which she and her partner approached the speed of life.
He was too regimented and she was too free and they had a tough time meeting in the middle. ENFPs go with the flow of life. We like not knowing where a day might lead us or what adventures we might find along the way.
Keep us on our toes. Be willing to go into a weekend or a vacation without having a schedule and surprise us by your willingness to seek out new experiences with us.
Some of this probably stems from the steadiness we find in those types. ENFPs have a tendency to be all over the place, but once you really learn our patterns, we are actually very predictable. Still, we are idea people who often have our heads stuck in the clouds. We need the gentle grounding of a person who is reasonable, steadfast, loyal, and dependable.
Hot and cold personalities are among the hardest people for us to connect with because we never really know what to expect or know where we stand with them. If you are warm and friendly one minute and cold the next, we will take it personally. Be consistent, especially in your interactions with us.
Knowing that we are an important part of your life validates our relationship and helps us know what to expect from you. Be willing to engage in parallel play.
Here’s the Kind of Relationship Each Myers-Briggs Type Thrives In
Parallel play is known as the stage in development when small children play beside another child without engaging with them directly. ENFPs are the most introverted of the extroverted types. Being so, we crave time alone to think, process, regroup, and reflect on current happenings and wonderings.
While we love people, we can become easily overwhelmed or overstimulated and need quiet time to re-energize. Especially at the end of a long day, there are few things that I love more than being beside someone who allows me to just be. Spend a Saturday curled up on the couch reading with us or in a coffee shop writing or getting work done. ENFPs need room to grow. More than most types, we see life as a journey and believe we are and should be constantly evolving through it. We are very quickly drawn to new adventures and ideas and while we do sometimes need to be pulled back down from the clouds, we also really value people who understand our need for consistent growth and new experiences.
We see them as opportunities to learn more about ourselves. Encourage our personal growth and hair brained ideas.
Find opportunities to help us try new things. Sometimes we do need to snapped back to reality, but learn us well enough to know when to gently tug us back to earth and when to encourage us to spread our wings and fly. Include us in your adventures. We love seeing the world through the eyes of people we love.
If there is something you love doing, take us along on the journey. It will help us to feel like we are seeing another side to you and we might also learn something about ourselves along the way. While this is really more about you than it is about us, anytime we feel like a person has opened up a piece of themselves to us, we take that seriously.
ENFPs throw our entire selves into life. To those raised in insecurity, he is the ultimate safety blanket. He will never permit anything bad to happen to those he is invested in. While he may not be the most adventurous and charismatic man in town, when it comes to being an employee in business and a partner in marriage, he is probably the perfect choice. Practical and Logical You could almost say that this typology is the backbone of society.
He is practical and logical. When something needs to be done, he will do it. Duty and Responsibility This guy will always put his duty before his personal desires. So he is good husband material and good corporation material. He is a superb employee and a wonderful father. He can be a bit difficult when it comes to more creative pursuits or to those who challenge the status quo. To him, moral obligations come first. He is the guy who will rescue the child who is in a dangerous situation.
He Knows a Lot These men have a lot of information at their fingertips. This is because they pay attention to everything around them. As a result, he probably knows how to fix the loo, upload a website, and do the foxtrot.
He will always go out of his way to learn how to do something the right way, and if he sees that it is necessary to know something in order to further his career or make his wife and family happy, he will go out to learn it. ISTJ men can be trusted to do a job well. He is Low on Sympathy and Empathy Everyone has their negatives. Nor has he ever been interested in exploring why some people struggle so much.
This is especially so if doing so will bring him into conflict with his deepest beliefs. This Man is a Traditionalist To this man, everything is done in a certain way.
He will never accept what is not traditional. To him, a home needs to be tidy, a child needs to score good grades at school, and the rain needs to fall in winter. Source His Career Reflects His Love for Tradition and Duty As a result of his great love for tradition, duty, and the status quo plus his need to judge have closurehe is best suited to those professions and careers that are strongly associated with implementing or enforcing what is right.
This could include the military, law, the police, or even politics. He is, by nature, an authoritarian. He, therefore, will fully obey those he considers above him in a hierarchical structure. He will also expect to be unquestionably obeyed by those he considered below him on that same structure. While this man will pursue the public good, he is, at some level, unable to comprehend fully what the public good is.