Ways to listen better in a relationship

How To Be A Good Listener

ways to listen better in a relationship

How to become a better listener. Being a good listener won't just make a huge difference in your relationship No one ever told us men that listening to women is an important part of "being a man," so we tend to discount it. To have a thriving marriage, it's critical to truly listen with empathy and generosity. Today, we're sharing 5 ways you can be a good listener. Responsive listening is at the core of good communication and closeness. When your partner really gets you, nothing else matters. So how can.

It makes you feel safe, understood, and important. Being heard validates you. Now think about a time when you had something to say, but you didn't get that level of attention. The other person was distracted, looking at their phone, clearly thinking about something else, or mentally lining up their response without acknowledging your words. You felt ignored, diminished, and inconsequential.

Become A Better Listener - AskMen

Their inability or unwillingness to really hear you felt like a slap in the face. Unfortunately, the art of being a good listener is becoming more and more of a lost art. Face to face and even phone conversations are no longer the primary way we communicate.

The gatekeepers of our interactions are the computer and cell phone where we email or text in terse, abbreviated, and frequently misunderstood communiques. It's nearly impossible to be a good listener when you're on constant alert for some other more important message coming in.

  • 7 Ways To Be A Good Listener

We all know it's important to be a good listener because we know how good it feels when we're heard. Most of us want to be active listeners and to have the people we care about feel heard. But the ability to listen well affords other benefits beyond supporting others and gaining their appreciation. Being a good listener is similar to having good manners. It's a quality that doesn't seem to be a social requirement any longer, but if you practice it, it sets you apart from the crowd and makes others gravitate toward you.

If you'd like to sharpen your skills, here's how to be a good listener: Remove or avoid distractions.

ways to listen better in a relationship

If you are going to converse with someone or several peoplethen take a moment to anticipate possible distractions and remove them. Turn off your cell phone and put it away. Turn your computer off or turn off the sound so you can't hear emails and notifications coming in.

Become A Better Listener

Turn off the TV, radio, or any other device that could be distracting. If someone needs to speak to you, and you're in the middle of a project or task, either ask them to wait until you're done or stop what you're doing to listen.

Multi-tasking doesn't allow for true listening. If you're in a social setting, and you are speaking one-on-one with someone, try to step aside to a quiet space where you won't be pulled away or interrupted by other people. Definitely don't look over the other person's shoulder while they're talking to see who else is in the room. Watch for non-verbal communication and tone of voice. Hearing someone's words is just a small part of being a good listener.

We communicate far more through our expressions, body language, and tone of voice.

ways to listen better in a relationship

When you are listening to someone, also watch them carefully. Are their arms crossed defensively, or are they sitting in an open, confident manner? Also, listen to how they present what they have to say. Do they sound tired, depressed, enthusiastic, confused?

Are they mumbling, talking too loudly, or stating everything as though it were a question? Learn the art of reading what people are really saying beyond their words. This can help you be more compassionate and understanding of people — and it can help you avoid getting involved with someone who appears deceitful, disinterested, or controlling.

A great technique for active listening is mirroring the person you are listening to. Without appearing to mimic them, try to reflect back their same tone of voice and speech pattern. You can also mirror their gestures and body language.

Mirroring helps build rapport with the other person, and it encourages the feeling that you share similar attitudes and ideas. The fact is that it's up to you to be a better listener. Being a good listener won't just make a huge difference in your relationship and sex life, but in every single aspect of your life that involves social interaction.

In order to become a better listener, especially with women, we need to relearn some of our old beliefs. Not realizing that listening is important No one ever told us men that listening to women is an important part of "being a man," so we tend to discount it. Understanding is not the same as agreeing You don't have to agree with your partner, just listen and try to understand.

People are usually more receptive to working things out and comprising when they feel understood. Not understanding the emotions expressed Women are emotional creatures in general ; therefore, it's extremely important for men to recognize the different sets of emotions that women speak with. For women, the feeling is usually more important than the content of a conversation but they would never admit to that.

Criticism If you need to be judgmental, be diplomatic about it.

ways to listen better in a relationship

There is such a thing as positive, constructive criticism. Don't try to fix things all the time Men are under the misconception that they need to provide all the answers in a relationship. Make sure your partner is involved in many decision-making opportunities, as she will feel more needed, involved and special. Always give her your undivided attention. Make sure that you're not watching the football game while she's trying to discuss your next vacation together.

The Art of Listening (How to save your Relationship & Marriage) -TD Jakes MUST WATCH